The obscene amount of time I spend thinking about all the things I do wrong and how I am for sure ruining my children and basically with an overall gloomy outlook, got me thinking... What about Dad guilt? Do Dads spend as much time thinking about their failings as we do? Are they constantly berating themselves for the things they can't do?
I slipped into the kitchen to make him a sandwich, I was gone no more than five minutes and I called him to the dining room to hop in a chair and eat up. I called once and no response, this was not abnormal. Bubby has a habit of ignoring me when he is involved in doing other more important things...much more important than feeding himself. I poked my head around the corner and called his name...no answer and Bubby was no longer in the living room.
Up until now, Bubby has been content with hanging out with Mommy. He tolerates my anti-social behaviour and knows when he wants to do something wildly outgoing, like going to visit the neighbour UNINVITED (gasp) on a whim, that he needs to talk to Daddy. Mommy is busy hiding under the covers with a flashlight and a book...don't tell anyone I am home. Ok, ok it's not all that extreme, I like people...a little.
At some point during every single day...the world as I know it disintegrates into chaos... I have forgotten to feed something, whether it be cat, dog or first born. Someone somewhere is going hungry. Someone has had pooh in their pants for way too long or is quietly somewhere dismantling a laptop.
Bear and I took the opportunity to get to know each other instead...I shared with him how excited Bubby was that he finally came out of Mommy's tummy and that he was going to be a big brother. And Bear told me everything about himself...mainly that he was hungry and very cute.